Help, Self-Help!



When Anger Hurts

When Anger Hurts.

Continuing my life of doing thinks I’d said I’d never do… Now I’m reading Self-Help books.

It all begun with my husband telling me about this book he’d read some years ago that literally changed his life. He insisted so much and finally he gave me the book as a present. (Obviously he thought that I would improve my “skills” when we have an argument.)

After our last disagreement, I though that I should give the book a try. And miraculously the book captivated me and I realized that I could improve my quality of life by reading it.

The book’s name is When Ager Hurts: Quieting The Storm Within, 2nd Edition by Matthew McKay, Peter D. Rogers and Judith McKay.

I’m not the kind of angry person towards others. I’m very easy going and my patience is very stretchable. But I’ve noticed that I was very angry at myself. The book did help me to point out all the anger that was building up inside me and sabotaging all my efforts to have a better life.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is such an American thing! Living here I could understand how it really works. People are very practical and rational about feelings. “If you do this, that will happen.” Causes and consequences.

I see why in Brazil is so difficult for this strategy to work. In Brazil, most of the time there is no consequences for your actions. You make a lot of efforts and nothing happens, only frustrations. Someone does a bad thing and there is no consequence either. Impunity.

In the US I can see why Cognitive Behavioral Therapy works. If you behave like a jerk, you will get the consequences! And fast! If you push yourself to achieve something, you have high probability that you will succeed. That is why USA is the Land of Opportunities!

If you are just a little smart and follow the guidelines in the book, you will improve your life as a whole.

There is another book that I’m reading as a consequence of the first book: Self-Steem, 3rd Edition, by Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning.

It is not a secret that I’ve gained more than 25 pounds after moving here and I am 60 pounds overweight. And I simply couldn’t stick to a healthy eating and exercising habits. Well, you don’t need to be a genius to realize that my self-esteem was rock bottom. And working with both books are helping me a lot.

I’ve always believed that weight problems are fundamentally psychologic/psychiatric problems. If you don’t treat the root of the problem, you simply won’t be successful.

Well, I think I’ve elongated me enough in this matter. So, my final thought is: if you have such problems, buy the books! They work!

And nobody paid me to write this post.

09. May 2016 by Liliana
Categories: Random Life | Tags: , , , | Comments Off on Help, Self-Help!


Fat and Happy :P

Fat and Happy 😛

This year has been very paradoxal.

In one hand, I am finally getting settle and comfortable in my new country. I made peace with myself regarding being a retired housewife, full time staying at home fur babies mom. I am enjoying my new life with no guilts nor demands. I really enjoy my free time.

But, and there always is a but, I have never been so dissatisfied with myself and my body. I have never been so fat. I have never been so out of control about my eating habits.

My logic conclusion is that not everything is all right. There is something wrong otherwise I wouldn’t be eating so much.

Well, I got used to eat everything that goes through my mind. I think about frozen yogurt, let’s have frozen yogurt! I look twice to Saltines crackers and then I am eating the damn Saltines.

I am not saying “NO” to myself. I think that I have endured so much that I will spoil myself with some treats. And this is my recipe to fail and to fattening.

This post is a “Mea Culpa”. It is my fault that I have gained weight. Despite diseases, medications, circumstances, it is I that have been eating all the stuff I don’t need.

This being said, what should I do? I can’t make promises. This is not a post about commitment and how I will bust my ass dieting and exercising and how I will lose all the extra weight.

I know myself better than this.

I write to organize my thoughts. And what I am organizing right now is that I have to take baby steps like make a little change here and there.

One thing I have noticed about my eating habits: I overeat during the night after 9 pm. Yesterday was a perfect eating day but I splurged myself after 9 pm watching TV. So I will refrain myself of eating past 9 pm.

I hope this positively impacts my weight loss and it becomes a new healthy eating habit for me.

Baby steps, Liliana.

Ah! I was forgetting something really important!  I should not eat unless I am hungry. That sounds obvious, but it isn’t. I shall not eat when I am not hungry! It will be a big difference!

So, my new Commandments:

  • Thou shalt not eat unless you are hungry!
  • Thou shalt not eat past 9pm!


21. April 2016 by Liliana
Categories: Random Life | Tags: , , , , , | 1 comment

10 Things I’ve learned Practicing Yoga

Ten Things that I’ve learned practicing yoga:
1- It’s difficult.
2- Dogs are attracted to you when you are on the floor posing Downward Facing Dog Pose.
3- Every muscle in your body will hurt. Even those that you were unaware they existed.
4- Your body changes fast. But it will hurt a lot.
5- You will feel stronger specially in your upper body.
6- You can’t inhale or exhale calmly when you are fucking posing and your heart beat is on the roof.
7- Your favorite poses will be Table pose, Corpse pose and Crocodile pose.
8- You will feel like you’ve been practicing yoga for ages but you’ve began just last month.
9- Did I tell you that it is difficult and it hurts a lot?
10- Regardless the fact of that it is fucking painful you will love it.

02. April 2016 by Liliana
Categories: Random Life | Tags: , , | Comments Off on 10 Things I’ve learned Practicing Yoga

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